Transitioning back to my work life

With less than a  month to go before I head back to work, I thought the best thing to do with my youngest, would be to transition her into childcare. For the next four weeks I am going to ease her into care, before the shock of me being back at work hits her and becomes the new norm for us all.

Today is her first day in care.

Dropping her off was filled with mixed emotions. The carers at the centre are extremely lovely, and my baby girl was in a good mood. From that point of view, everything was pleasant. For me though, it felt like such a loss. It’s the end of the beautiful time we have had together, where I have been her main caregiver every day of the week. Now, other people get the pleasure of spending time with my precious girl.

Support and well wishes from friends and family has certainly helped. I know that the long term benefits will be so positive for us all. I will no doubt write a future blog post on all the positives of childcare, based on my own experiences and of people I know. I’m sure there will be plenty of positive experiences to fill a page or three.

But today is tough.

I miss my girl. I am sure she will be fine and that she is having a wonderful time with her new friends, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t staring at the clock, or wishing time would hurry up so that I could see her and hug her again.

What about you? How were you when you dropped your child off for the first time? Did you find it tough too? What did you do to cope?

I have a facial appointment booked this morning. A treatment I had actually booked and paid for 2 years ago, but have never been able to go until now. I will make myself enjoy it. I will relax, but not too much. I don’t want to fall asleep, and when I pick up my girl, I will give her a cuddle and tell her all about my day.

Fingers crossed she hasn’t nailed walking.

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  1. 1

    Both of mine have started childcare from about 10 months and while the first day is always very hard, some drop offs a certainty harder then others.
    Like when they ball their little eyes out, because they don’t want you to leave, that’s pulls your heart strings, but the worst one I ever had, was the first time I put my little girl down to leave and watching her put her little arms up… to the childcare worker!
    Totally crushed my whole chest, as it felt like I was just stabbed in the heart.

    • 2

      Absolutely! Leaving when your baby cries feels like it goes against every protective part of your body. Walking away is definitely the hardest part. I recall having to do that many times with my eldest. I am sure she picked up on my misery at dropping her off, and was just as distressed back.
      Having your baby look for comfort from others is also tough. It’s a double edged sword. You want them to be comforted and cared for when you leave them, but you always want to be the most important part of their life, which you are.
      It has taken my eldest to help me see that. She was shocking at every drop off for two long years. She can’t remember that. She can only remember how much fun she had and that she misses going so badly. I am hoping her positive spin will help the youngest settle. Only time will tell.

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